Embarrassment that will live in Infamy

After classes at 5pm, I went to review anatomical structures in the lab with a group of classmates.  We reviewed the abdominal cavity and inguinal canal.  Female’s inguinal canals vary in their content from male’s inguinal canals.  Females have a round ligament of the uterus which extends out of the inguinal canal to the labia majora.  At precisely 5:40pm on October 5th, 2015, I asked, “Where are the labia majora?”  After the words left my lips, classmates roared in laughter, and the first one to speak was my professor, and he had the most evil, evil, pleasure-full grin on his face! It was at this moment my knees gave out, and I fell behind the cadaver wishing I was a dead horse to be shot out of its misery.  Incapacitated under the cadaver table I was hyperventilating with laughter and shear horror at my stupid, stupid, stupid question.  There are such things as STUPID QUESTIONS!!!!  And asking them makes you want to die!!!!!!!!!  Here is the proof that my brain shuts down at 5pm sharp- waking up at 3am has its consequences.  This moment is in my top 3 most embarrassing moments, and it makes pulling down my pants in a delirious state seem like paradise.  October the 5th will forever be my day of infamy…and I am just praying the professor does not ‘Look’ at me tomorrow, or I am going to find a Demerol needle. Classmates gave me hugs, and one classmate took me to get Greek food for dinner on our way home- thank you kind soul for having pity on me.

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Washing dishes in my abode, my landlord’s friends left after dinner.  One guy came to the window while I was washing dishes.  “What you making for dinner?” “Not making, I’m washing.”  “I’d be a good husband for you and wash those dishes….what’s your name?”  “Shequita.”  “Mine is Stress-Free…let me cook you a stress free dinner some time” …blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada, yada…he left.

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Our surgeon professor went to point out an inflamed appendix on a student’s laptop in the back, and she nonchalantly mentioned “Well I guess I won’t show him, he’s sleeping.”  Everybody in class whipped their head around and just started laughing.  A classmate had his head against the wall and a gaping sleeping mouth.  The best part is it took him 3 minutes to wake up when the classes laughter shook the walls.

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